Monday, May 23, 2011

If you oppose taxation...

The following was posted on, under the title of "102 things to NOT do if you oppose taxation." Well, thank you for making our arguments for us. My response to each situation is listed in italics.

1. Do not use Medicare.
Don't use it, even though I'm forced to pay for it every week so that others may use it.
2. Do not use Social Security
Same as with Medicare. I'm 32 years old. By the time I'm old enough to receive these benefits, the money bucket will have long-since run dry...but thanks anyway.
3. Do not become a member of the US military, who are paid with tax dollars.
Meh. Tried it. I got lucky. All it cost me was two weeks of my life. In return, I got a check for $25 (that almost NO ONE would cash!), a really bad hair cut, and a new pair of running shoes.
4. Do not ask the National Guard to help you after a disaster.
Why would I ever expect someone to help me, if I'd never given them a reason to?
5. Do not call 911 when you get hurt.
Trust me, I won't. I like my rat terrier, I don't want my door kicked in by some donut-munching thug with a badge who feels the need to shoot my 7lb dog because he made a "furtive movement".
6. Do not call the police to stop intruders in you’re home.
When seconds count, the police are minutes away...but it takes half a second to cycle the bolt in my big scary black rifle.
7. Do not summon the fire department to save your burning home.
If my home catches on fire, I'm summoning a water hose. Incidentally, this home has fire insurance coverage through a PRIVATE company.
8. Do not drive on any paved road, highway, and interstate or drive on any bridge.
My FUEL taxes, which are paid for by my VOLUNTARY consumption of gasoline, pay for my do my inspection and registration taxes.
9. Do not use public restrooms.
I can't recall the last time I used a truly "public" restroom. Many are "open to the public", but are maintained by private companies on private property.
10. Do not send your kids to public schools.
Trust me, if I can avoid it, I will. I'd like my kids to actually learn stuff.
11. Do not put your trash out for city garbage collectors.
My "taxes" don't pay for garbage collection, my monthly garbage bill does.
12. Do not live in areas with clean air.
Who says taxation provides clean air? Do you have any proof of this?
13. Do not drink clean water.
Again, who says taxation is responsible for this?
14. Do not visit National Parks.
15. Do not visit public museums, zoos, and monuments.
I've never been to a museum or zoo that I didn't have to pay to get into. As far as monuments go, I've never asked for one to be built.
16. Do not eat or use FDA inspected food and medicines.
I eat FDA-inspected foods because it's hard to buy food that isn't FDA-inspected...but I'd rather do without it. Same holds true with medicine, even though it's a rare occasion when I take anything stronger than aspirin.
17. Do not bring your kids to public playgrounds.
You didn't ask my permission when you stole my money to build it. Don't have the audacity to say I can't take my kids there after you've done so.
18. Do not walk or run on sidewalks.
I don't. I drive on roads that my VOLUNTARILY paid fuel taxes funded.
19. Do not use public recreational facilities such as basketball and tennis courts.
I don't. They're usually dilapidated and filled with all manner of drugged-out miscreants.
20. Do not seek shelter facilities or food in soup kitchens when you are homeless and hungry.
If I was homeless and hungry, I wouldn't be paying taxes, now would I? No, I wouldn't. Instead, I work for a living, so I'm forced to pay taxes to feed and shelter those who won't.
21. Do not apply for educational or job training assistance when you lose your job.
I don't. I look for another job.
22. Do not apply for food stamps when you can’t feed your children.
I work for a living, and I don't have children. This does not apply to me. If I had children, I'd feed them.
23. Do not use the judiciary system for any reason.
I've never VOLUNTARILY used the judicial system. The only reason I've ever been FORCED to use the judicial system is because the revenue-generating tax leeches thought my actions (which have never victimized an actual nameable person) were somehow "criminal".
24. Do not ask for an attorney when you are arrested and do not ask for one to be assigned to you by the court.
A) It's my right to have an attorney.
B) If you don't want me to have adequate legal representation when YOU feel my actions are "criminal", don't arrest me without being able to name a victim.
C) I've never asked for government to pay for an attorney to defend me.
25. Do not apply for any Pell Grants.
I freely admit to using Pell grants in school. However, my income taxes had covered them, and then some, before I ever used them.
26. Do not use cures that were discovered by labs using federal dollars.
Since when did government labs "cure" diseases?
27. Do not fly on federally regulated airplanes.
Trust me, I'd much rather fly on an airplane that didn't require me to do a virtual strip-search through a scanner machine or have a TSA agent feel up my nutsack.
28. Do not use any product that can trace its development back to NASA.
What, you don't think we would have invented Velcro and dehydrated "orange drink" without spending a trillion dollars on putting people in outer space for the sake of studying the effects of zero-gravity on the human male erection or whatever it is that we're doing?
29. Do not watch the weather provided by the National Weather Service.
Ummmm...I don't. I look outside.
30. Do not listen to severe weather warnings from the National Weather Service.
Again, I look outside.
31. Do not listen to tsunami, hurricane, or earthquake alert systems.
If we have a tsunami in Texas, I'm blaming HAARP...which was funded by my tax dollars. Ha! I win.
32. Do not apply for federal housing.
What, you mean like living in the projects? Thanks, but no thanks!
33. Do not use the internet, which was developed by the military.
Why not? I helped pay them to develop it! Furthermore, are you suggesting that mankind wouldn't have created the interwebz if it weren't for Arpanet?
34. Do not swim in clean rivers.
There's clean rivers around here? Really? Where!?
35. Do not allow your child to eat school lunches or breakfasts.
Unless you're dirt poor and on federal assistance, you PAY for school lunches and/or breakfasts.
36. Do not ask for FEMA assistance when everything you own gets wiped out by disaster.
I think I'd rather ask my friends and family, before I'd ask for the privilege of moving into a FEMA-approved formaldehyde-filled deathtrap that I've already paid for.
37. Do not ask the military to defend your life and home in the event of a foreign invasion.
Gun owners in the state of Texas alone comprise the third-largest armed force in the world. I somehow don't think I need the Air Force on this one...
38. Do not use your cell phone or home telephone.
As much as I'm afraid to, due to the way my tax dollars are being spent to monitor telephone conversations, I will continue to use them. AT&T is not owned or operated by the US government.
39. Do not buy firearms that wouldn’t have been developed without the support of the US Government and military. That includes most of them.
No, it doesn't. John Moses Browning designed the 1911, Eugene Stoner designed the AR15, etc...and they were working for private corporations who submitted designs to the US government. Currently, our troops use the M16A2 or M4, which is a variant of the Armalite AR15...and it was designed YEARS before it was first adopted by the US Air Force.
40. Do not eat USDA inspected produce and meat.
I'd gladly not do so, if they'd LET ME not do so.
41. Do not apply for government grants to start your own business.
Yeah, I wouldn't do that on general principle.
42. Do not apply to win a government contract.
Again, I have no intention of doing so, because I know they'd be paying me with money they've stolen from me!
43. Do not buy any vehicle that has been inspected by government safety agencies.
I'd prefer to buy a vehicle that I have personally inspected, as opposed to being forced to pay for a bureaucrat to inspect.
44. Do not buy any product that is protected from poisons, toxins, etc…by the Consumer Protection Agency.
Pardon me, but I'm smart enough to know that it's bad to eat batteries.
45. Do not save your money in a bank that is FDIC insured.
I don't.
46. Do not use Veterans benefits or military health care.
Again, I don't. Even if I were eligible, let's be real about it. "Veterans' benefits" are part of the compensation package you receive when you contract with the government.
47. Do not use the G.I. Bill to go to college.
Again, I don't.
48. Do not apply for unemployment benefits.
Why not? My unemployment benefits are being paid with the taxes I'm FORCED to pay while being employed. Be real about it, it's "unemployment INSURANCE".
49. Do not use any electricity from companies regulated by the Department of Energy.
I'd prefer to NOT do so...but since the DoE won't let me, I don't have much of a choice.
50. Do not live in homes that are built to code.
Built to whose "code"? My code, or some city inspector's code? Why should I be forced to get government approval to live in a home? Furthermore, why should I be forced to pay someone to give me such approval?
51. Do not run for public office. Politicians are paid with taxpayer dollars.
Don't worry, I won't...
52. Do not ask for help from the FBI, S.W.A.T, the bomb squad, Homeland Security, State troopers, etc…
Trust me...I won't.
53. Do not apply for any government job whatsoever as all state and federal employees are paid with tax dollars.
Now you're just being funny!
54. Do not use public libraries.
I'll be glad to, as soon as you stop using my tax dollars to prosecute people for violating "intellectual properties" laws that are violated every day at public libraries.
55. Do not use the US Postal Service.
I don't. We have this new thing now, it's called "e-mail".
56. Do not visit the National Archives.
Why would I want to?
57. Do not visit Presidential Libraries.
See #56.
58. Do not use airports that are secured by the federal government.
I wouldn't do so, if you'd let me use one that isn't "secured" in such a manner.
59. Do not apply for loans from any bank that is FDIC insured.
I don't apply for loans, I buy shit with money that I earn.
60. Do not ask the government to help you clean up after a tornado.
We haven't had a tornado around here in quite a while, thank you. I don't think we're in any danger of having one any time soon.
61. Do not ask the Department of Agriculture to provide a subsidy to help you run your farm.
Yeah, ummm...I don't own a farm. I'd like to not be forced to pay for someone else to own a farm.
62. Do not take walks in National Forests.
I don't live anywhere near a "national forest".
63. Do not ask for taxpayer dollars for your oil company.
I don't own an oil company.
64. Do not ask the federal government to bail your company out during recessions.
I don't support government bail-outs.
65. Do not seek medical care from places that use federal dollars.
I don't.
66. Do not use Medicaid.
Again, I don't. I pay good money for private insurance, it would be a hell of a lot cheaper if I didn't have government regulations driving up the price.
67. Do not use WIC.
I'm neither a woman, nor do I have infant children.
68. Do not use electricity generated by Hoover Dam.
I use electricity provided by private corporations.
69. Do not use electricity or any service provided by the Tennessee Valley Authority.
I don't live anywhere near the TVA.
70. Do not ask the Army Corps of Engineers to rebuild levees when they break.
Okay, I won't.
71. Do not let the Coast Guard save you from drowning when your boat capsizes at sea.
I don't own a boat.
72. Do not ask the government to help evacuate you when all hell breaks loose in the country you are in.
If "all hell breaks loose in the country I'm in", I certainly won't ask for help from the government...because I'll be in this country, and my government will likely be the cause of it!
73. Do not visit historic landmarks.
Why not?
74. Do not visit fisheries.
Huh? What's a "fishery?"
75. Do not expect to see animals that are federally protected because of the Endangered Species List.
I don't.
76. Do not expect plows to clear roads of snow and ice so your kids can go to school and so you can get to work.
It snows here, on average, once every decade. I think I'll be okay...
77. Do not hunt or camp on federal land.
Don't plan on it. There are far too many regulations.
78. Do not work anywhere that has a safe workplace because of government regulations.
I honestly don't think it's possible to do so.
79. Do not use public transportation.
What's "public transportation"?
80. Do not drink water from public water fountains.
81. Do not whine when someone copies your work and sells it as their own. Government enforces copyright laws.
Unless, of course, you're lending it out from a public library. Then it's okay, right?
82. Do not expect to own your home, car, or boat. Government organizes and keeps all titles.
I own the things I own, because I bought them. Government paperwork only complicated the process.
83. Do not expect convicted felons to remain off the streets.
Stop felonizing every activity known to man, and there won't be so many damned felons!
84. Do not eat in restaurants that are regulated by food quality and safety standards.
I prefer to eat in restaurants regulated by the knowledge that people won't eat in places that serve shitty food. I don't need an inspector to tell me such things!
85. Do not seek help from the US Embassy if you need assistance in a foreign nation.
I don't go to foreign nations.
86. Do not apply for a passport to travel outside of the United States.
I shouldn't have to.
87. Do not apply for a patent when you invent something.
Okay. If you can build it better and cheaper than I can, go for it!
88. Do not adopt a child through your local, state, or federal governments.
I shouldn't be forced to go through a government agency to adopt a child.
89.Do not use elevators that have been inspected by federal or state safety regulators.
Most people have enough common sense to know that their elevators require maintenance, just like my vehicle does. It's called "common sense", and we don't need to pay a tax stamp for it.
90. Do not use any resource that was discovered by the USGS.
Are you saying that oil rigs wouldn't exist without bureaucracy?
91. Do not ask for energy assistance from the government.
What is "energy assistance"?
92. Do not move to any other developed nation, because the taxes are much higher.
Surely, you jest...
93. Do not go to a beach that is kept clean by the state.
So you're saying that seaweed and litter (which is there, IN SPITE OF state clean-up efforts) would prevent me from going to the beach?
94. Do not use money printed by the US Treasury.
I would, but the US Treasury would arrest me for using alternative currencies.
95. Do not complain when millions more illegal immigrants cross the border because there are no more border patrol agents.
If it weren't for regulations which only apply to honest citizens, there would be no incentive to illegally cross our borders.
96. Do not attend a state university.
Why? I still have to pay tuition to attend, and you're still taxing me regardless of whether I attend or not.
97. Do not see any doctor that is licensed through the state.
I'd prefer that my doctor not be required to be licensed by the state, as this would reduce my costs of health care...but you'd send him to jail if he didn't have one.
98. Do not use any water from municipal water systems.
I'd prefer not to. Municipal water systems are usually full of toxic chemicals such as flouride and chlorine, which I'm forced to pay for.
99. Do not complain when diseases and viruses, that were once fought around the globe by the US government and CDC, reach your house.
You mean like the "Swine Flu", and other viruses that the CDC created?
100. Do not work for any company that is required to pay it’s workers a livable wage, provide them sick days, vacation days, and benefits.
My employer is not "required" to pay me vacation, sick pay, benefits, etc...but they do anyway. My wage is far beyond the minimum required by law.
101. Do not expect to be able to vote on election days. Government provides voting booths, election day officials, and voting machines which are paid for with taxes.
Why vote? It only encourages the bastards. Besides, if it made a difference, government would have already criminalized it.
102. Do not ride trains. The railroad was built with government financial assistance.
I've never ridden a passenger train, and have no intention of doing so.

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